dancing-to-your-heartbeat:

Showing up at your best friends house uninvited.

dancing-to-your-heartbeat:

Showing up at your best friends house uninvited.

(via armageddonsandwich3)

armageddonsandwich3:

myfoxdfw:

what if god was one of us just a stranger on a bus

I laughed way to hard at this

armageddonsandwich3:

myfoxdfw:

what if god was one of us just a stranger on a bus

I laughed way to hard at this

I’m too horny for the amount of sex I’m not having.

(via armageddonsandwich3)

Titleit's exactly what you think

birdschoolforbirds:

nah son, i ain’t got no snapchat. I’m old-fashioned. just fax it to me. fax me the nudes.

(via armageddonsandwich3)

killbenedictcumberbatch:

drugdoer:

A hero’s journey

this gif is like 20 seconds but it was like watching an entire movie

killbenedictcumberbatch:

drugdoer:

A hero’s journey

this gif is like 20 seconds but it was like watching an entire movie

(via armageddonsandwich3)

ridge:

80% chance he’s referring to anal

(via armageddonsandwich3)

vanehwasreal:

me and my friends asked to act casual for a picture

image

(via armageddonsandwich3)

princekarkat:

for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch

princekarkat:

for some reason i thought both of these were the same post and i sat for awhile trying to figure out which ice cream face was the weak bitch

(via armageddonsandwich3)

wh0re-mouth:

noitsfabrayberry:

person: he’s so hot

lesbian: i don’t think he’s that attractive

person: yeah but you’re not sexually attracted to men

lesbian: i’m not sexually attracted to shoes either but i can still tell when i think a pair looks good

THANK YOU

(via armageddonsandwich3)

hiddlestalker:

*AGGRESSIVELY STILL ISN’T FINISHED WITH HOMEWORK*

(via armageddonsandwich3)

aradiator:

i hate when people say that women should dress more modestly in order to “leave something to the imagination”. leave what to the imagination? what do people think is under my clothes? a mass of algae? memes? shinji ikari?

(via armageddonsandwich3)

hod-the-blind:

dx11:

mancermechro:

not sure why people don’t automatically say “shapeshifting” when asked what they want their superpower to be. you could become anyone you want. even fictional characters. anyone. cosplay would always be spot-on. dysphoria wouldn’t exist. perfection

rob a bank and disguise yourself as a stray pen lying on a shelf when the cops come

A pen with a shit ton of money lying next to it.

(via armageddonsandwich3)